Minimising Responses vs Compassionate Responses

Phrases like “try to look on the bright side” are often said in an attempt to be positive and supportive, but saying this to someone who is struggling can come across as invalidating and minimising.

When we jump straight in to positivity and problem-solving as a response to someone opening up to us, it can actually make them feel worse, as we are denying their experience.

When someone is struggling, it can be helpful to hold space for them and meet them where they are at. We can do this by using empathy and compassionate responses to validate their feelings.

Compassionate responses let someone feel heard, seen, supported and understood. Responding to someone’s feelings this way let’s them know that it is okay to feel whatever it is they are feeling.